I posted this to my personal page on last week.
And just now, at 1:05am on Thursday .. while I sit awake waiting for her next round of needs, facebooks shows me the new six year ago memory. It was the ultra sound! More on that next week!!
On this day, six years ago we were so confident in our adoption journey, we shared that we had been chosen.
As I look at us and who we were, I see so much more than two rested soon to be parents. I remember the tears, the years and the struggle to become parents. I remember the decade of living with an empty crib as various agencies told us we were ready and waiting. The dreams of what it would be like.
Mostly, I remember the joy that filled my heart each time, and the hope that this time would be different. It sure was.
There isn’t a single part of me that doesn’t believe that we were made for Seeley, and she for us. We were preparing, learning, cultivating a strong marriage, and logging sleep. Meanwhile, I am sure God was figuring out how to cram so much unreasonably remarkable, miraculous and mischievous into one tiny babe.
Being this beauty’s mom has taken strength I didn’t know I had, love that would become so endless it seems to grow each time I give her more, and all of the desire to thrive that we built up over years and years of waiting.
For us being Seeley’s parents is answered prayer. She is exactly what Billy and I dreamed of and a ton more.
She is special. Special all her own. She has disabilities and labels. She has struggled we haven’t uncovered yet. But there is so much to this kid that doesn’t show up on the diagnostics. She is magic. Her hugs can heal. Her belief in herself is remarkably protected. She is strong, gifted, determined and works so hard.
I can’t wait to see where we are in six more years. Might we be in a mermaid tail, struggling with sleep, facing puberty or dealing with it easily because of years of building skills to cope with all of the things?
Six years after that, phew!
One thing I know for sure, I will probably still be tired, filled with love and watching her reach her potential. For sure, Billy and I will never be bored.
Time travel doesn’t make today awesome, so back to the present — this kid is preparing for kindergarten. I have one more week of this summer with her, Covid or not, weirdest year ever aside — time marches on.
I am going to make slime, bake muffins, color, play barbies, work on letters and then serve lunch. I will watch her eat a corn like a caveman, followed by a popsicle for sure. Then we are picking her backpack and talking big girl stuff while we take a walk.
Luckiest, proudest, caffeinated and motivated mom, out. Curtsy.